This is going to take some getting used to...[For Verity, open to Ixis]

[smartass_captain]

There's an awful lot of commotion going on in the tower. Sounds like Ixis has his tail in a knot over something or another. It almost sounds like he's arguing with someone. Guess he's going to head up to his quarters and sulk for a good while.

Typical, right?

Except 'Ixis' isn't upstairs at all. He's looking around the entryway on the ground floor, scowling at everything he sees with equal contempt.

"Well, this is just great." Honestly? Jim doesn't know what to do. He's got his phone in one of the magi's pockets. He supposes the first thing he should do is text Verity and see where she's at. Being all but herded to the ground floor before Ixis went storming upstairs hasn't left him with any more answers than when this whole fiasco started.

Wow, trying to grab his phone with his claw hand isn't going very well. He's just standing there like a doof.

Comments

[ixis]

Huh. He's frowning, but in thought. Consideration. He furrows his brow a great deal; poor Jim, first he's gonna burn your body, now he's gonna cause accelerated wrinkles.

"Nothing of the sort is going to happen. I'm not like the doctor."

A morbid part of him is TOTALLY thinking he could certainly kill Jim's body just to experience it. He IS wondering what that's like now that the boy has said he knows the sensation, even if it's a death as miserable as what he described. But what good would that do? It'd be a short-term goal with no real payout other than satisfied curiosity, and then he's stuck with the situation of being a spirit and having to find a way back into his occupied body. Not worth it.

"Chaos energy is raw power, not the poison leaking off a foolish method of powering machines. And asking me to work WITHOUT it is going to be a long and grueling process."

[smartass_captain]

"Do you know that for sure? Has Verity been exposed to it for long?" Shit, if Ixis did that to Verity. Jim has to sit down. Right on his behind, damn the tail getting pinched. He might be sick.

"Oh god, Verity..." Jim puts his head in his hands and just. Sits there. His tail curls around himself protectively, as if he's trying to shield himself from anything and everything about the outside.

He doesn't say anything else. At least he's not lighting anyone on fire or breaking things?

[brave_heart_verity]

You know what's good in times like these?

Chocolate.

And Naugus knows where her stash is, if he's interested.

[ixis]

"She's fine. Vale's bones, if you thought it was that dangerous, everyone I've ever come near in the Nexus would be in danger. These artifacts have shaped civilization and progress and power on Mobius since the dawn of time. They're highly sought after and rigorously researched. The echidnas harnessed it to make their nation a floating island and their longterm exposure and use of the emeralds made them the most advanced society to ever exist. What do I have to say to convince you this is a non-issue?"

He totally heads for where he knows that chocolate is kept. And...opens it up and starts eating it himself. Then stops.

"...Am I going to die because I put chocolate in your ridiculous body?" If even strawberries are a danger, who knows what else there is!

[smartass_captain]

Jim could argue the differences between acute radiation poisoning and prolonged exposure to lower doses. Could talk about the cancers and other conditions it leads to. That Naugus has no concrete proof that humans aren't affected differently than other species.

But he wants Ixis to be right.

"...No." He doesn't take the bait. It would help if Jim even had an idea of how this happened. But Dr. Hill is gone, and Naugus won't let Jim be in the know about anything. Jim pulls himself up slowly. He doesn't want to be here anymore.

[brave_heart_verity]

Verity would want Naugus to be right too, if she knew what they were talking about.

Good thing she missed that.

The thing about glasses is, everyone knows when you've been crying because of the spots on the lenses. She's going to take a moment to wash hers off before coming back out.

[ixis]

"Don't be so glum. The look doesn't suit me at all." At least he can eat chocolate in peace. The box it set on the kitchen table, where he spots the jar of strawberry jam.

"Now that's just cruel." Reminders of what will never be until he is back in his body! Maybe he should take the jar and put it on his desk to keep him motivated.

[smartass_captain]

Still feeling queasy, Jim sighs and slowly gets to his feet. Ixis is probably right. And what choice do they have, really? If he needs to use the damn thing to get them switched, it's a risk he needs to be willing to take.

He's made much riskier gambles before, but he also hasn't known ahead of time just how bad the consequences would be in every intimate detail.

"Whatever. Sorry for yelling. What's...what's our plan for fixing this? How...long do you think we'll be stuck wearing each others skins?"

[brave_heart_verity]

"It wore off Samus pretty quick." When did she get back? Well, just now really. She's quiet in those slippers of hers. "But she wasn't tied up with anyone else that time."

She's not going to be meeting their gazes yet; pretending to be busy drying her glasses seems better than having to explain what just happened. "Lunch is going to be ready soon, and please don't eat all my chocolates."

[ixis]

"I wasn't!" He says as he sneaks another into his mouth. See, there's still some. A few. Three. What the hell, Naugus.

"Well, like I said, I've had some experience with spirits inhabiting other bodies. Though not in terms of a clean swap between a pair like this. But I'm confident I can figure something out within a few nights. Though I don't see why you're the one so eager for it; you've clearly gotten the better end of the deal here. Meanwhile, I'm stuck in a soft-skinned body with no ears or tail OR magical acclimation." He's gonna grow a beard. Just you try and stop him.

[smartass_captain]

"I got the better end of the deal only if there's a furry convention in town." Jim mutters while Ixis stuffs his face with chocolate. If he weren't in such a somber mood, he would take a big spoonful of the strawberry preserves and eat it in front of Ixis.

But since he is, it's a passing thought that gets discarded in favor of sighing.

"So..there's nothing I can do to help. Great." He can't run his hand through his hair because he doesn't have any hair. Ugh. "I'll hang around for lunch, but then I'm out of here. There's got to be something I can do." Sitting in Ixis' tower twiddling his thumbs for 'a few nights' is so not going to happen.

Don't threaten him Ixis, Jim is not afraid to shave his beard.

[brave_heart_verity]

Letting Jim wander off when he's in this state sounds like the worst possible answer. She's not keen on that idea at all. But first she needs to save her chocolates because seriously, Grandpa, and it gives her time to think.

"Why don't you go to the farm for a few days? There's plenty of things that need doing around there. Maybe we can convince Clint to take a few days off to help?"

[ixis]

"Farm work? My magnificent body being put to farm work like a simple peasant?" What a horrifying thought! What if someone SEES him!

[smartass_captain]

"Well, I've been thinking..." Jim looks back up at Verity finally. "I wasn't the only one on scene when this happened. Other people might have got caught up in the...whatever this is, too. Shouldn't we get stock of who all has been affected, so when Naugus figures out how to fix it, we can administer aid as is necessary?"

Amazingly, given the temper tantrum Jim just got done having, he has been doing something other than feeling sorry for himself since this swap happened. Or maybe Jim just doesn't like feeling helpless. Equally plausible.

"I'm none too eager to head to the farm looking like this. We have aliens, but nothing this alien in Iowa. If my neighbors saw me, i'd be arrested on sight."

[brave_heart_verity]

"I was thinking more making sure the raccoons don't get in the attic again." But that's details.

And Jim has a point. "That's a good idea. This is why you're such a good captain." Verity's proud of you, Jim. That's why you're getting the smile. "I'll stay here to help Naugus."

Before he starts, she points out, "You're going to need someone to make sure you don't accidentally poison yourself and I know these things."

[ixis]

Naugus might have gotten distracted during this exchange, rubbing his tongue around in his mouth with a sour expression on his (Jim's) face. "How do you stand having such flat teeth? And so FEW? The chocolates are getting pressed into these silly hind teeth shaped like blocks..."

Oh, wait, what were we talking about? He glances between the pair before recalling what the line of conversation was. "Oh! Well...I suppose that's smart. But are you sure you're all right in my body? I mean, Vale's bones, look how you're holding my tail." He wanders over to bend down and pick it up in both hands, brushing off the dust that it's accumulated from dragging so much. Then just kinda holds and admires it.

"See, THAT'S powerful. You're taking this for granted." A fine muscular tail to go with the rest of his fine muscular body.

[smartass_captain]

"I don't have a tail, so I don't know what muscle makes it not do that." Jim points out. Pauses. "Could you maybe stop putting my hands so close to your butt?" Verity don't you dare photo this. Seems like Jim's more or less back to normal.

How is he grand master of anything with his attention span and petty nature? Jim nearly sighs again, and then...realizes that's his mother talking. Ixis must be good at whatever it is he does. He manages alright.

"Also, you've got the hottest body in the Nexus Bar-None and all you've done with it is burn yourself. If anything's going to waste, it's...actually you know what. I'm fine with you not hitting on people in my body." And if Jim leaves, Verity gets to have that talk with Ixis. Oh joy!

Have fun with that, Verity.

[brave_heart_verity]

Photos? Hell no, she doesn't want any reminders of this.

"You're both pretty, there's no need to fight," she remarks. Because that's going to help! "No wonder you two fight so much, you're so alike." Yup, definitely helping.

On the other hand, there's food and it smells delicious when she takes it out of the oven. That might really help?

[ixis]

"Hottest! As in attractive!? Did we not cover the lack of ears? The flat teeth? The-...Look at this." He drops the tail to lifts up his shirt, revealing Jim's bare tummy. "Look. Pathetic. Like jelly. Soft and vulnerable. What being would want to bed this travesty? I would feel like I was inflicting mental trauma if I tried to woo someone in this body."

Omg i laughed too hard at this you guys

[smartass_captain]

"Uh yes, have you looked in a mirror? Eyes? Face? Hair, ass? I am seriously good--what are you doing? Wh--HEY."

How the fuck does he know Jim's sensitive about that! He works out all the time, dammit. He's toned, he just can't...build muscle very well. Frankly for how thin he is he should be grateful he's as in shape as he is. Still, if Ixis is capable of blushing Jim is red with embarrassment.

"You take that back! At least I'm not as old and wrinkly as dirt!" Jim will show that son of a gremlin the what for. "Horn, Neckbeard, I bet you even---" Well, would you look at that. Ixis Naugus is apparently swole as all hell.

"BULLSHIT!"

You two are ridiculous, you know that right? :P

[brave_heart_verity]

Verity is staying the hell out of this one. Even she can tell there's no stopping them now.

Nope.

Just going around them, setting the table and things.

https://vine.co/v/eg1MYPD3nYq

[ixis]

Who has time for food when it's a FLEX-OFF now.

Except not really, because his body has been revealed to be jacked beyond all reason. Naugus just cackles and drums his hands on that bare, less-toned belly of Jim's.

"NOW who doesn't take care of their body properly?"