Some days, a man just can't catch a break. [Open, tagging Clint and Verity]

[smartass_captain]

New York circa 2013 isn't such a bad place, Jim has decided. There's so much to take in and watch that he's certain he could be kept busy for months on end just trying to learn everything he could. Clint had explained currency to him today--Jim knew what it was, just not how it all divvied up. He'd done a bit of research on a clunky old machine Clint had told him the name of and Jim had subsequently forgotten. Some kind of ancient PADD device on an obsolete web browser.

Some girl had shown up hassling Clint about something or another a while ago, and the archer had assured Jim he wouldn't be gone long and left. She was too young for Jim to pay much attention to, and Clint didn't need Jim tagging along for every babysitting job he ended up getting drug off to. Or it was a neighbor asking him about a leak in their ceiling, in which case Jim was just a jerk.

Wooden stairs creaked in protest when Jim finally left the apartment building, being careful to lock up with the spare key he'd gotten from Clint that was stowed safely in the pocket of his purple sweatshirt he was borrowing. Eggs again for the third day in a row didn't seem appealing, and Clint had given him a bit of money, so Jim is heading down to the corner to grab a bite of whatever awesome smelling food was being sold by the vendor he'd been watching from the window for three days now.

"Bro, look! At the corner by the falafel stand bro!"

There, at the corner, was a scruffy short haired blond in a purple sweatshirt and sweatpants, fumbling in his pocket for the correct change to pay for his order. Truly, an easier target would never happen. He didn't even look like he'd had his morning coffee yet. (Jim hadn't). The next thing Jim knows, his delicious smelling food is strewn on the street as a couple thugs in tracksuits drag Jim off into an alley trying to beat the shit out of him.

"What the hell?!" That was his breakfast, assholes!

Comments

Really not appealing. Probably very accurate.

[brave_heart_verity]

She had an MRE once. On a dare. She's never let herself get drunk enough to play those games again. Replicators will not be her friend.

The shift in Jim's posture doesn't go unnoticed. Verity thinks it's a good sign; he must be feeling better. She's more relaxed too, not as constantly on guard.

"That sounds amazing." She can't hide that she's a little envious, and honestly she doesn't really try. Having a purpose would be nice. "Are there a lot of non-Terran cultures where you're from?"

Now imagine eating that for 5 years straight.

[smartass_captain]

"Yeah. My first officer is Vulcan. Well, half. They're a crazy intelligent race of touch-telepaths who operate solely on logic. It's as irritating as it sounds." Still, Jim sounds very fond even as he gripes. "They're also endangered now because of.." Wow. That was gonna be...a long story. A long story culminating into Jim being dead. "Some stuff that may have been the major reason I became the youngest captain in Starfleet record."

"But there's plenty of planets in the Federation. We try to keep things level--species with mind altering pheromones or things like that have to go through some admittedly kind of harsh hoops to get into Starfleet, but it's a public safety thing more than anything. Hell I was born in space."

Jim leans over and peers into Clint's box while he's talking, and steals what looks to be a chocolate chip cookie from it. Clint has plenty more in there and Jim's box was sadly cookie-free. Though considering he has coffee cake and pound cake in his, well that just means he pours himself another mug of coffee.

"You said you've been t'space before, right?" Jim points at Clint after a long sip. "No pointy eared robots, blue antennaed guys or green skinned pheromone spewing mind controllers?" He's curious as to how different this universe's galaxy is. Or..you know. Maybe they were looking in different places is all. Space was a big damn place.

"Space, the... ah, fuck it, let's go get a burger."

[aw_hawkguy]

Jim's welcome to cookies; it's share and share alike. "Uh, well, there's blue guys and green guys," he admits, "and they hate each other. The Kree and the Skrulls; they had a war, Earth got caught in the middle, we ended it for 'em. Sometimes, one side or the other thinks it'd be a good idea to invade, and we have to fight 'em off."

He takes a sip of coffee and chuckles, admitting, "you're not gonna believe this, but I actually died fighting 'em off, one time." Oh, right. Coffee. Take a big drink of coffee, it's too early for beer.

https://youtu.be/RrxlbLVcpqI

[brave_heart_verity]

"Youngest captain and you get the first deep-space mission? You must be really good at it." She's not entirely sure what his job is besides making sure everyone else is doing their jobs, but that's pretty important. Otherwise, it might all be pillow fights and naptime and nothing would ever get explored.

Verity has no interesting "so this one time I ended up dead" stories and is very glad of that. Being as she's the only one in the room with that privilege, it seems to have fallen to her to be the comforter. This is disturbing both in its unfamiliarity and its genderedness. But here Clint, have a little pat on the arm.

Time to change the subject. "Skrulls are the shapeshifters, right?"

Shore Leave is a beautiful thing indeed.

[smartass_captain]

"Well, yeah you could say that." Jim Kirk is a pillar of modesty. "Pretty sure my CMO and first officer would disagree though." Bones had a habit of telling Jim that what he was really good at was putting himself in harm's way to try and save his crew.

"Shit, was that the fire thing?" Jim remembers Clint saying he couldn't handle fire because he'd died one time. "If that's a different event I'm gonna feel really bad in like a second here. Been there, done that and I couldn't imagine dealing with it again." Jim stares down at his half eaten slice of pound cake. He seems to have deflated back into just Jim again. Jim has a lot more weaknesses than Captain Kirk does. Something most super hero types probably understand pretty well.

He gives a long look Clint's way, then toward Verity. He doesn't know what all she's suffered through, but knows that she had mentioned being cursed too. "How are you sane? Either of you?" Jim suspects they may not be. He sure as hell doesn't feel like he is, most of the time.

http://i51.tinypic.com/2djt288.jpg

[aw_hawkguy]

"There, uh, was fire that time, yeah," Clint admits. He's quick to move on to Verity's question, though. "Yeah, Skrulls, shapeshifters. The Kree infected 'em with something, form-locked 'em for years. Fixing that helped end the war. Then one day, we get crazy religious-zealot Skrulls coming down, shot-up on superhuman DNA to copy people's powers. That's gratitude."

And that probably answers Jim's question, too. It's not whether Clint is sane, it's that the universe is crazy.

http://bit.ly/1uCey68

[brave_heart_verity]

Jim's so modest he could give lessons, except that would require admitting he's good at it. His deflating like that is no good. Verity wants to cheer him up, but she's not sure how.

On the bright side, he gets an answer to his question. "Clean living and Jesus." She deadpans it so well, given the fact he's never seen how much she drinks he might believe it.

"Okay, but how did they end up in the beef supply? Because I have seen some things at the supermarket that really shouldn't be there." Oh yes, she can see the Skrull steaks. Good going there, Richards.

Ha!

[smartass_captain]

"You eat the aliens you meet? The sentient ones?" Please please let that be a joke because really that's harsher than the Klingon conquest modus operandi. Jim isn't that hungry anymore. The box of parties is set aside.

He will, however, keep his coffee. Caffeine is essential for starship captaining. And he doesn't want to be the only one just sitting there for story time.

Re: Ha!

[aw_hawkguy]

Clint chokes on his coffee. "Skrull steaks?! Seriously? What the hell? Like, recently?"

This, um, might be news to him, too.

http://marvel.wikia.com/wiki/Skrull_Cows_(Earth-616)

[brave_heart_verity]

"I don't eat them," she protests. "I don't think anyone means to. But. Is it possible some were hiding as cows or something? I mean they are shape-shifters, who knows where they ended up?"

Mostly to Jim she offers, "I can make sure you don't get any of that. And I'm sure Clint's going to get the Avengers on this. Right, Clint?" Don't make her beg, dude.

What the ever loving fff-

[smartass_captain]

"Couldn't they like shape shift out?! Before the slaughterhouse?!" No Jim there aren't skrulls in the cake and muffin you ate probably. Apples are probably still fine. They better be, as Jim's second favorite food. But burgers were no longer safe. Not in this world. Goodbye, number one food.

Jim is suddenly glad he hasn't asked Clint to go out and try real food that is not replicated. If he'd eaten a burger since he got here, he might just vomit right now. The idea of eating another humanoid race is pretty horrific to him.

"...At least the coffee isn't aliens." Mutter, worry, sip.

[aw_hawkguy]

"Yyyyyeah, I gotta make a call, 'scuse me." There's a phone on the wall in the kitchen, but he's going to go get his cell phone from upstairs, because speed-dial. Also so that it's maybe a little muffled while he does battle with the Fantastic Fone-Tree and maybe chews out the smartest man on the planet for hypnotizing alien invaders into the food supply and not telling anyone about it.

[brave_heart_verity]

Verity nods in acknowledgement when Clint leaves then turns her attention to Jim. Specifically, trying to get him to focus on her instead of freaking out. "Jim. Look to me."

Does he remember this from before? The touch of her hand, the steady insistence of her gaze? "Jim. Listen to me. I promise I won't let any of that near you. I promise. It's going to be okay."

[smartass_captain]

It isn't the same, Jim. There's no cannibalism here. Probably. And even if there was, he didn't take part in it, even by accident. Verity's right. Everything is okay.

"Just...shocked me, that's all." Yeah, brush it off, laugh, smile. You're Jim Kirk, nothing gets at you. Except she's Verity Willis and even if you can bullshit yourself, you can't bullshit her.

"It's happened, before. Is all." It's his way of an apology, sort of. It's at least an explanation. For the lie. Jim lies a lot but it's usually to cover his own weaknesses.And suddenly it's becoming very real just how far into him Verity can see. He shakes slightly, gulps in a deep breath. He'll beg Verity if he has to. "Don't make me talk about Tarsus. Please."

Not today. He doesn't want Clint to know how broken he is, to see him like this. There's no helping it with Verity. She's nice though, so Jim figures he'll let her know a bit more than most others. Until she gets sick of him and leaves. They always do.

[aw_hawkguy]

From upstairs comes a muffled, "Reed, you got some 'splainin' to do!" Beat. "Explaining. It's a--dammit, Reed," before it gets too quiet to make out individual words.

[brave_heart_verity]

The lie doesn't upset her. Not this time. There's a little flicker in her expression, a look like she's anticipating pain, but no anger. She'd lie to herself about this sort of thing too if she could.

"You never have to tell me anything you don't want to," she assures him quietly. "I'm sorry I upset you. I should have been more careful. I'm sorry."

Will he accept a hug from her? Because she has this hug she wants to give him. It's a little awkward, but it's genuine, and maybe they both need it right now.

[smartass_captain]

It occurs to Jim suddenly that since he'd arrived in the nexus all he'd done was show weakness. He jerks his head in a nod and grips at her shoulders when she hugs him.

"This isn't me. I'm not like this." The self loathing drips from his voice. This is you, Jim. This has always been you. Abuse, abandonment, death. Jim doesn't want to be here, suddenly. He wants to go home, where he's in control and no one knows what's in his head.

"It's not."

[aw_hawkguy]

"In the food, Reed, that's where. No, I didn't see one myself." It doesn't sound like it's going well.

[brave_heart_verity]

Okay, maybe she just needs to stop trying to hug people.

"Of course not. You're hurt and you've been through a lot the last few days. Nobody expects you to be at your best." She understands, really she does. There's no judgment or loathing in her voice. "You should see me when I'm sick, I am the whiniest baby. I put the entire concept of 'manflu' to shame."

And yes Clint she can hear you. This is not inspiring confidence.

[smartass_captain]

She can try to stop hugging Jim, but he's clinging to her shoulders pretty tight right this second. He just needs a minute. She's not demanding answers out of him or even judging him. Jim doesn't want to. Doesn't want to be this. So he doesn't.

Jim chokes back everything until there's just a comforting numb. Pretend it matters. Pretend you're on duty.

"So." And he even sounds conversational. Though talking directly into Verity's ear is probably a bad idea. He pulls away. "You guys know the guy that did this? That's weird."

[aw_hawkguy]

"No, it's not 'an interesting example of genetic diffusion,' Reed, it's people in the meat. Somebody wrote a book about that, it's why we have an FDA!" Somebody browsed Wikipedia on his last hospital stay. Pause. "I don't care what he meant it to be about, that's not the point."

[brave_heart_verity]

No, he can cling if that's what he needs, it's fine. She'll even pet his hair a little. The talking directly in her ear is a smidge loud, and the pretending gets a raised eyebrow.

"I don't. I'm guessing Reed Richards, but I could be wrong. He's a very famous scientist around here, likes to claim he's the smartest person in the world. He certainly believes it." Not that she does. "It doesn't make you a bad person to be sad sometimes. It's not a weakness to be human."

[smartass_captain]

"Clint has the smartest guy in the world's phone number?" Jim snorts and gives a reasonably convincing smile. It's buried deep again. Where it should be. He can't believe he's let these strangers see this. Bones hasn't seen this. No one has.

"I'll be alright, Verity. I haven't been at my best since you meet me, that's all." The smile is pained, but it's honest. "I feel like that's all I've been doing since I got here."

[aw_hawkguy]

"Willis. Verity." Pause. "Yes, she's regist-don't give me that, I wasn't alive for that mess." Pause. "No, her power's not useless." Pause. "No." Pause. "'Had to invent a--' Reed, I'm going to bring you a Skrull steak, and I'm going to hit you in the face with it, and you can tell me if it's hypothetical then."

A few moments later, Clint emerges, coming down the stairs with a groan of, "arrogant son of a--..." Glancing sheepishly to Verity and Jim, he asks, "so... how much of that did you guys hear?"

[brave_heart_verity]

"He's an Avenger. He probably has all kinds of people's phone numbers."

Gee, that sounds a lot like what she'd just said to him. "Hey, you survived a lot more than I could have. If you get much more impressive I won't be able to handle it."

The joking would go better if she hadn't just heard that. Again. Her gaze drops when she hears Clint trying to defend her, which is sweet, and doesn't quite lift again when he comes back.

"I take it Dr. Richards won't be investigating?"