Taking a Step in the Right? Direction [Valentines post for conjuredskies]

[smartass_captain]

Has Felix ever been to Earth before? Jim doesn't know, but a small part of him hopes not lest he be brutally disappointed in the Iowa farmhouse in the middle of nowhere Jim has given him coordinates to. Not that the snow covered fields are bad to look at necessarily, but it's so plain compared to Tamriel and okay--maybe Jim is just agonizing over details here.

He's made sure to brush the fresh snow off of the path leading up to the house, certain amazing siblings have checked to make sure there aren't any unwanted critters lurking about and that the place is tidy and accommodating for guests. Stocking the fridge, giving idiot-proof meal plans for Jim to execute, helping him clean--they really are the best. Hell, this was even Verity's idea. For which Jim is grateful for, seeing as how he'd been completely content to skip over this without so much a second glance.

Then Felix had lit up like a kid at Christmas and Jim knew he had to throw something together. He's done his own shopping and preparing for today and has a fire going in the living room while he paces by the large window facing the yard definitely not checking the clock every thirty seconds to see if it's time yet. If this were a booty call Jim would be so confident right now but he's actively trying to make a romantic evening here and he's so out of his depth there.

Comments

[conjuredskies]

“Not mine.” If there’s a magic at work here it’s a kind he wouldn’t meddle with.

His eyes flutter half-closed as Jim strokes his face, leaving the mage’s skin tingling under the gentle trace of his fingertips. They’ve spent a lot of time touching each other over the last few months, but this is something entirely new. Unknown territory. Perhaps he’d be nervous if he had enough sense left in him to wonder, but he’s lost right now, wrapped up in this moment and this touch and this… kiss.

He’s taken off-guard when Jim breaks it, but relaxes immediately when the captain doesn’t move away. “…Oh. That’s a good point.” His surprise gives way to a teasing smile. “The evening wouldn’t be complete if I missed that. Besides, I suppose I don't have to let go of you for that..."

[smartass_captain]

It's on the tip of his tongue. Simple words that could define all of this. Give them some semblance of structure. Definition. Focus. But while Jim is a brave and foolish man in many regards, this is his weakness. In this, he is a coward.

He knows the words, but can't muster up the courage to say them.

There's whispers of them in the way he caresses Felix's cheek, smiling and chuckling and just content to lean against the Imperial with no groping or grinding or panting. In the way those blue eyes shine when Felix smiles. Or the kiss Jim place son the corner of his mouth before he tugs them toward the fire.

His actions whisper the truth Jim is too afraid to say out loud.

"Hey. I went through the trouble of looking up a poem and decided I was gonna humiliate myself reading it. Don't make that commitment go to waste." Jim never breaks the hold they have on each other as he inches them toward the fire, and then down onto the pillows on the floor.

[conjuredskies]

Felix already understood Jim wanted him to stay; that this would be a more permanent arrangement than either of them had first intended. He never gave much thought to just how much Jim cared: courting a companion for the foreseeable future doesn’t mean one wants them forever. Especially not given their respective circumstances. But at some point tonight they’ve crossed another line. Felix doesn’t know when. Only that this means much more than casual companionship. He wonders if Jim feels it, too.

He doesn’t want to question it. Some things are too fragile to touch before they’re ready.

He sinks onto the pillows with Jim, shifting to get comfortable while he props himself up. The fire’s crackling away beautifully over the strains of unfamiliar yet sweet music, blending the homely with the alien. It feels natural, though.

“Of course not. I’ll try not to distract you,” he promises with a grin.

[smartass_captain]

The lines were there for their own good. So no one would get hurt. Jim has lived within those lines for a long time. But he's never felt this content, this satisfied with the companionship he has. Feeling wanted, appreciated...this is new for Jim.

He thinks back to their outing in Tamriel, and to the way Felix reacted when Jim was teaching him about space. Felix likes it when Jim is confident, in command....nearly as much as Jim likes Felix doing the same. He sucks in a breath and stills his expressions. He'll read this as though he was addressing his crew. Formally. Intellectually. The PADD is removed from Jim's suit in case he needs it, but the poem wasn't very long.

He doesn't break eye contact while he recites, staring into Felix's eyes with intensity.

"A poet by the name of Faiz Ahmend once said..."

Last night, your memory stole into my heart—
as spring sweeps uninvited into barren gardens,
as morning breezes reinvigorate dormant deserts,
as a patient suddenly feels better, for no apparent reason ...

When he's finished, he lets himself smile just a little bit.

"You can laugh now."

[conjuredskies]

Felix does love to watch Jim take command of a situation. There’s no denying the way that tone makes him still, Jim holding his gaze while he listens. The flicker of his smile when Jim recites as if he’s known the verse for years.

“Laugh?” Never. He’s smiling gently, but he’s not laughing. “At beautiful words spoken well?” Such words. There’s a warm fluttering sensation at the thought they might carry even some truth. He lifts a hand to stroke along the line of Jim’s jaw, his smile and tone turning a little more teasing. “Only you are allowed to relax, with poetry.”

[smartass_captain]

"Yeah, but you like this voice better. And besides, I am relaxed." It's a smile, but Jim hasn't dropped his command posture or voice. Nor has he dropped Felix's gaze. His suit is too warm next to the fire and buzzed like he is, but Jim still manages not to look like there's a hair out of place.

"You love it when I'm in command. Almost as much as I love you making me not be." Any straying fingers are getting kissed gently, all while not breaking eye contact.

"What else do we need to cross off the list for your ideal Imperial romantic night of wooing?"

[conjuredskies]

His observation gives Felix pause, for a moment – perhaps gives him some comprehension of how closely Jim takes note of his reactions. He’s not used to expecting that kind of attention from most people, and under that gaze he fumbles for an answer. One that dissolves into a wordless intake of breath as the words Jim chose sink in. If he thought it was startling to hear the captain recite love poetry, hearing him use the word and mean it is something else. Hearing him use it for them.

He may well be entranced now, watching Jim with wide eyes until he realizes there’s a question. Clears his throat hurriedly.

“Well- you’ve fed me, plied me with wine, impressed me a few times. Romanced me very… very thoroughly. I think… this is where we leave the list behind.” His hand isn’t trembling faintly. He’s just a little unsteady on these pillows, that’s all.

[smartass_captain]

Fuck.

Fuck he just...well. Well then.

Jim is proud of himself in a way that cannot be explained for not freaking out and backing off when the realization of his word choice occurs to him. In fact, the only indication that he's aware at all is the way his smile loses some of its commanding edge and turns softer--more unsure.

Felix isn't backing away. Isn't stopping this to clarify. He's perfect.

"Really." Jim's the one leaning forward this time, maneuvering them so Felix is leaning back against the support the foot of the couch they're not sitting on offers. "So you've no other wants? Desires?" He's not bridging the tiny gap between their lips, deliberately holding back just enough for there to be no actual touching. He's teasing yes, but Jim needs to know.

He needs Felix to make the final call. He hadn't intended to let that slip, but now that it's out there....

[conjuredskies]

There’s a quiet edge of urgency to Jim’s motions, a hint of uncertainty in his smile. Felix knows him just well enough to sense it, even as he finds himself backed smoothly against the couch, Jim leaning tantalizingly close.

There are times when stopping and demanding answers is wise. Felix doesn’t think this is one of those.

“Only one,” he replies softly. “Only you.” His hands slide around Jim, gently holding him steady. Holding him close, as Felix closes that tiny gap with a tender kiss.

Scene? Unless you have anything else?

[smartass_captain]

Jim sighs, a breath he hadn't realize he'd been holding.

There would be time to worry about this later. To fret and second guess and talk about things Jim doesn't want to talk about, but which need to be said with this line crossed. This last line in the sand smudged clean away.

Later.

They could deal with that later. Jim's shifting his weight, unbuttoning his suit jacket with deft fingers and laying it over the arm of the couch. For now, for right now, he has all night to worship every inch of Felix's body, memorize every line of muscle, every scar, with a tenderness that was not allowed before. He'll drive the other mad, but Felix getting impatient with Jim is one of the things Jim loves, too.

They have all night. After all, it is Valentines Day.

No, that's perfect!

[conjuredskies]

(( And a lovely way to wrap up. ))