Taking a Step in the Right? Direction [Valentines post for conjuredskies]

[smartass_captain]

Has Felix ever been to Earth before? Jim doesn't know, but a small part of him hopes not lest he be brutally disappointed in the Iowa farmhouse in the middle of nowhere Jim has given him coordinates to. Not that the snow covered fields are bad to look at necessarily, but it's so plain compared to Tamriel and okay--maybe Jim is just agonizing over details here.

He's made sure to brush the fresh snow off of the path leading up to the house, certain amazing siblings have checked to make sure there aren't any unwanted critters lurking about and that the place is tidy and accommodating for guests. Stocking the fridge, giving idiot-proof meal plans for Jim to execute, helping him clean--they really are the best. Hell, this was even Verity's idea. For which Jim is grateful for, seeing as how he'd been completely content to skip over this without so much a second glance.

Then Felix had lit up like a kid at Christmas and Jim knew he had to throw something together. He's done his own shopping and preparing for today and has a fire going in the living room while he paces by the large window facing the yard definitely not checking the clock every thirty seconds to see if it's time yet. If this were a booty call Jim would be so confident right now but he's actively trying to make a romantic evening here and he's so out of his depth there.

Comments

[smartass_captain]

Jim really should ask what that entails to an Imperial. It hasn't crossed his mind, yet. And when it does Jim is going to need to put his wine glass down so he doesn't choke on it. What if he's going about this all wrong?

He set this all up referencing Verity and Clint's advice in mind, but Felix isn't American and Jim is just kind of clenching and unclenching his jaw trying not to say anything while he gets his thoughts in order.

"So..." Good. Casual tone Jim. you got this. "You do know what kind of holiday this is on Earth, right?"

[conjuredskies]

He could guess that question was due, sooner or later. Though he hadn't expected Jim would be willing to ask it out loud. Felix looks at him quickly, trying to gauge what he's thinking. There's a hint of tension in Jim's face, and Felix hides his own stab of worry under a rueful smile.

"I didn't," he confesses, eyes on Jim's with the kind of earnest intensity he gets when he's determined not to say the wrong thing. "When the idea of celebrating came up," he gives a small, apologetic shrug, "I didn't know what I was asking." How many times could that be said of their relationship?

"But I did some research before I came," he adds, "so I have, er- some idea, now." And now his smile's a little less apologetic and a little more pleased, despite himself. He still hesitates before he dares to add, "And more reason to be glad you agreed anyway." Which might be the most overt reference he's yet made to the unspoken rule of this arrangement. You just don't say it.

[smartass_captain]

There's something hammering in Jim's ears. It takes him a second to realize it's his pulse and that he's gone a rather bright shade of pink at that last comment Felix made. He's not sure if he's terrified or excited right now and it's a weird place to be. Luckily the broiler can hold his attention for a moment while he pulls out the pizza he'd been finishing off to fill the ktichen with delicious goodness.

"So...How does Tamriel do this?" Jim gestures toward the dining room, where the normal table's been pushed away and a smaller one complete with cloth, candles and more wine is waiting for just the two of them. "Not...the holiday-obviously. But like...you know. Romance type stuff." Jim sets the pizza down in the center of their table for two.

"Cuz I'd like to know before you laugh at me how much of this I"m getting right."

[conjuredskies]

“How could I laugh at you?” he murmurs, looking over the arrangements less to judge them and more to give himself time to think. “I don’t think it’s so different in Cyrodiil. Flowers, gifts, quiet dinners and night strolls along Lake Rumare. Adventures into the forest during the summer.”

Felix looks back at him with a grin and adds, “In Skyrim you just set an attractive suitor some dangerous task to prove their affection. If they succeed you marry them. Very straight to the point.” He chuckles. “We Imperials like to take our time a little more.”

Although. That does bring up something else, and he hesitates about whether to wait. Jim’s the expert on How Things Are Done on Earth, so he chooses to just come out and say it, “I wasn’t entirely certain how to play my part, but I did, ah. Bring something.”

[smartass_captain]

"Neither one of us is rocking a set of tits, man. There are no roles here." Jim snorts and shakes his head. "It just...occurred to me that all of this was assuming you wanted to be romanced like a 2000s American and you are neither of those things, and I'm only one of those things."

"I uh...I didn't get you flowers. Sorry." Jim actually looks a little guilty when he says that. "I just figured, you know. You were excited about this, so I...wanted to make an effort to do this right." Jim rubs at the back of his neck and drops his gaze to the tablecloth.

"This is the first time I've ever celebrated today, to be honest."

[conjuredskies]

Felix studies him a moment, startled at how much of his guard Jim is letting down in this admission. He sets the wine glass gently on the counter, slips over to slide an arm round Jim's waist and lean close enough to nuzzle against his cheek.

"No-one's ever made this kind of effort for me," he murmurs softly, an admission in kind. "And I don't just mean dinner."

Letting Felix into his home, under his guard. Trying something he wouldn't normally. That means something, and even if they daren't put a name to it Felix has an idea what it's worth.

[smartass_captain]

"You're kidding." Jim understands why he hasn't. He's avoided this like the plague, never getting into a relationship enough to bother with this--only ever falling hard for people he couldn't have. This is new for him. To be in a relationship enough to bother with this? Because that's what this is, right?

Somehow, along the way, this became a Thing. A thing Jim desperately wants to keep even though he knows all the reasons why he shouldn't. This makes him happy. Felix. Makes him happy.

"Nice guy like you? Here I thought I'd be beating people away to compete for your attention on a day like this." The cuddling is so nice. When did that happen? When, how did a smart mouthed conjurer from a world so unlike Jim's become so much a part of his life? The captain sighs, leans into the embrace.

"...Let's go get your pizza ready hm? I'm not done treating you like royalty yet."

[conjuredskies]

"No." Felix chuckles. No need to go into all the reasons why, he thinks. He's not sure how many would even make sense to Jim... not without explaining a few things about conjuration he's reluctant to go into. Necromancy and soul-binding probably aren't on the list of romantic Earth topics. He's not sure, mind, but he's going with his gut.

"I wouldn't notice. You always have my sole attention." It's a promise. Not just a deflection from the abashed grin he's wearing. "I'm just lucky I haven't had to duel anyone for you, yet." He's teasing. Absolutely. Just kidding.

He's also not about to argue with pizza. "Well, if you insist..."

Jim, he's going to use them all. All the toppings. Not the whole of each bowl, but everything's going on there.

[smartass_captain]

Felix's pizza can be a cornucopia of flavors. Half red sauce and half white with a rotating flavor wheel so that he can taste and try everything. Flavor alchemy. That's the best kind of alchemy right? The one you can eat?

Jim's honestly curious which parts he will and won't like, because there's certain flavor combos going on there that he sure as heck wouldn't have thought to put together. His own pizza is sliced while Felix's broils and then both are set up at the small table for two.

Ever the conscientious host this evening, Jim is sure to keep Felix's glass topped off with the wine. Now that the admission that he's not an expert at this sort of wooing has come to light, Jim feels less tense about things. It's easier to smile.

"Not gonna lie, that looks like a hot mess. And I can't wait to see you eat it." Jim points at Felix's 'masterpiece' while he teases.

[conjuredskies]

Felix laughs as they sit down. “What, you don’t trust my judgment?”

The first mouthful he bites off is fairly tame: chicken and pepper and white sauce, by the look of it. He shrugs at Jim while he chews, smirking once he’s swallowed. “You see? Delicious!”

After the next bite though, his expression turns to a pained frown. “…Although I think pineapple with pepperoni was a mistake.” Give him a minute... “So were the olives.”

[smartass_captain]

Jim holds out the plate his pizza is on, not saying a word. The eyebrow and grin say 'I told you so' all the same, but that's why Jim made one too, right? So Felix could freely play with his food.

"Don't know if you don't try." Jim quips, chin propped in his free hand while he watches Felix. he's been doing that a lot this evening. Just watching.

"I promise dessert won't be nearly as harrowing."

[conjuredskies]

"Sure you don't want to make it a trade?" Felix teases, gesturing at his pizza. He'll wind up snagging a piece of Jim's anyway, but he's determined to eat as much of his as he can pretend to be edible. Trying something more traditional is just how he gets a baseline. A delicious, delicious baseline.

"What do you have in mind for dessert?" he asks playfully. "You have the look of a man planning something."

[smartass_captain]

"Baked apples with a streusal filling." Jim says around his third or so glass of wine. "Verity insisted on chocolate, but I really don't have that big of a sweet tooth, so I figured I'd share one of my favorite desserts instead. There is chocolate fudge if you decide you don't like it though."

So like every other time, Jim's plan is to get allllll of the things and have his bases covered. Just in case Felix doesn't like any one particular thing.

"But after that I'm more or less out of ideas. Figured I'd just ask you what you wanted to do, if there was any traditional Tamriellic romantic activity we could partake in."

[conjuredskies]

“Hmm.” Felix contemplates that prospect, and the food already before them, with appreciation. “We won’t be moving too fast for a while, that’s quite certain.”

Contemplating what they might do afterwards occupies most of his attention for another couple slices of pizza, which sadly distracts him from passing judgment on at least four flavor combinations. So much knowledge, lost in a heartbeat. “First, of course, I give you your gifts. After that... tradition would say we curl up by the fire together. Talk, tell stories, read poetry if that takes your fancy.” His is a world without movies and, for that matter, without readily portable music.

[smartass_captain]

"I've got the fire going, music queued up, and a blanket big enough for two as well as throw pillows on the floor. We're set there." No flower petals on the floor but that just seemed like a mess and a half to clean up and Jim isn't home often enough to want to spend half a day cleaning for anything less than a particular kind of mess making.

The poetry thing raises an eyebrow.

"I have to make up poetry? That's gonna be...huh. Okay. Challenge accepted."

[conjuredskies]

"Really?" He doesn't hide his surprise at that. But then any occasion that's supposed to call for poetry generally calls for him to get faking. "I don't usually trouble about who composes it..."

It's a relatively narrow selection of potential partners who even care about hearing the stuff, to tell the truth.

[smartass_captain]

"Well, I mean. I've never done it before." Jim admits and gives a shrug. "But if that's important to you and romantic for your world, I'll give it a shot."

Somehow, he doesn't think limericks will count, and even that he'd have to look up off his PADD. This is sure to be very embarrassing for the captain, but he's willing to sit through it for Felix. There's an increasingly short list of the things he won't at least try for the Imperial.

"What kind of poetry?" He's gonna get a fourth glass of wine. Being drunk is sure to help him compose romantic prose. Surely this can only end well.

[conjuredskies]

“It’s certainly romantic, but I can’t claim it’s typical,” Felix points out softly. He’s trying to allow Jim an out without seeming ungrateful, or damping the captain’s determination.

And, well, no-one has done such a thing for him before and it’s hard to ignore the part of him that’s delighted Jim would even try. Which is, of course, the real success in these cases.

“I’m hardly a literary aficionado,” he admits. At least he can try and ease the stakes here. “It’s usually something simple and a little silly. About one part natural metaphors to two parts compliments…” He’s still bemused to be talking about it. "Not that I know what Earth poetry is like, of course."

[smartass_captain]

Note to self. Look up poetry while getting dessert ready. And never, every tell anyone the previous sentence ever happened. He will get down on his knees and worship every inch of Felix's body before admitting to anyone he was about to do research on poetry.

He'd ask what the fuck is wrong with himself but he knows.

Jim's known for some time.

"As long as the bar's low, I think I can handle this." He'll get at least one nice one, and them maybe start waxing poetry complimenting Felix's body in as many ways as he can think of. You know, because it's Jim.

[conjuredskies]

“I have to keep it low,” Felix assures him. “Suppose you return the challenge?” Not that that’s a suggestion. Maybe he ought to be more careful what he says right now. He pauses to look down at the remains of his pizza. He’s polished off most of it – it’s hard to go too far wrong with pizza – but Jim definitely had better judgment. “Although I didn’t take you for a cook either, and I think you’ve beaten me on this.”

He’ll do his best to finish his wine before Jim refills it again, to be a better audience. He's really not sure how he talked Jim Kirk into reciting romantic poetry for him, but that's one hell of an accidental achievement.

Perhaps he'll have to think on this unexpected power he's found. Who knows if Jim wants that happening?

[smartass_captain]

It occurs to Jim as he's clearing the table of their plates that coming out and admitting he's head over heels in love with the conjurer is probably less embarrassing than what he's about to do. But embarrassment Jim can deal with, and he's still not...well. He's afraid to admit the former.

"I really seriously can't cook." He calls back to Felix as Jim disappears into the kitchen to get dessert for them. "Verity did most of this!" He hollers--making a point that Felix doesn't need to come in here for a minute or anything. Jim snatches up the PADD from the counter and closes out of the meal prep instructions Verity has written out bullet point style for him and starts looking up classical poetry.

Wow a lot of this is stuffy and artsy and Jim blanches.

Okay. okay. He can do this. There's a short one that doesn't compare women-flesh to fruit or other weird things. Poem selected, the PADD is tucked into his inner suit pocket and dessert is fetched.

The baked apples were about the only part of this meal Jim actually cooked himself, using an old recipe his grandmother had always made for him when she was still alive. Somehow, sharing a good family memory with Felix feels more intimate than anything else. Lord knows he's seen a sliver of the bad already.

[conjuredskies]

Felix automatically moves to help clear up, but in a moment Jim’s whisked off with the plates to the kitchen and doesn’t seem to want any help.

“But you’re the one who cared to do it,” he answers quietly, half to himself. Unsure of the etiquette when visiting an Earth house, Felix hovers for a minute, trying to peek politely at the kitchen door. Then he accepts what seems to be the hint and occupies himself with examining the room a little more closely while Jim’s busy.

He’s still wondering how to read all this – how he dares to read it. The personal effort, the unexpected intimacy, the willingness to make embarrassing romantic gestures… for that matter, this house may be better-appointed and subtly wealthy in ways he’s never seen before, but he doesn’t get the impression Jim brought him here to be impressed. Or that Jim even knows it’s impressive, he thinks, and realizes he’s smiling again.

No, this really doesn’t feel like Jim showing off, or Jim playing a part to prove he can. It just feels like an honest attempt to show he cares, and that brings Felix back to the possibility he’s managed to avoid looking in the eye up to now...

His thoughtful look has nothing to do with the furnishings by the time Jim comes back, but he’s lightning-quick to flash a smile at the captain and settle back down.

“Just when I think I have no appetite left,” he remarks, sniffing appreciatively. Looks new, smells familiar and delicious. “Another local Earth dish?”

[smartass_captain]

Jim has no idea how impressive this house is to someone from Felix's world. It's laughably old by his world's standards, though enough has been remodeled that it's still a modern home. Replicators and the like.

The smile sends shivers down Jim's spine, and he's grinning back before he can even catch himself. Felix in his world's clothes, in his home. It feels right. Even though he shouldn't. Even though Jim shouldn't be doing this. Getting his hopes up. Getting attached. It brings Felix closer to the truth about Jim and while it terrifies him he can't seem to stop. Not if it makes Felix smile like that, tilt his head to the side and give Jim that wry side eye of appreciation.

"My grandmother's recipe, actually. This I did make, so sorry in advance if it's not as good as everything else. That's why there's backup dessert."

With things its so easy to provide an out, to apologize for his lack of talent or skill by giving Felix something else in return. But when it comes to feelings? Jim can't just give Felix a substitute for his own inadequacy. He's been staring for too long, and covers his embarrassment with a cough and a hand before dropping his gaze and sitting back down.

[conjuredskies]

It’s a recurring paradox to Felix: the contrast between Jim’s brash self-confidence and how careful he is to keep those backup plans. Failsafes. Perhaps it’s the captain’s cunning in him? It’s still a little odd to sense that buried caution: as if Felix were a more demanding partner. As if Jim was the one who needs to prove himself.

It’s as well that Jim looks down, because seeing that reaction only widens the Imperial’s smile.

“Well, I hope your backup will keep for tomorrow.” Look at that hot appley goodness! He lifts his glass in a brief salute (is it full again? Good Sanguine). And perhaps it’s the wine or the mood that emboldens him, but he lets curiosity have the run of his tongue for a moment: “Your grandmother?”

Jim is so rarely inclined to speak of his family. Granted, Felix can’t remember if he’s said anything about relatives who aren’t Stratos, but surely Stratos is plenty for anyone.

[smartass_captain]

Of course Jim has to prove himself. He refills his glass even though he really shouldn't be drinking much more and takes a sip to distract himself from needing to speak again right away. Blue eyes watch intently as Felix helps himself to the dessert.

"My father's side. This was her home until..." A shrug. "Until I came around. After my dad passed we moved in. She was always kind in her own way." Jim wishes he could have spent more time with her. It's not often he finds a fond memory within his own family. "Sam and I always loved seeing her. My older brother. She passed away though, before I was more than twelve."

Which is what had sent him to live with his Aunt on a little colony in the middle of nowhere. Tarsus IV. Jim doesn't dwell on that chronological time too long. Not today. This is for Felix. Everything is for Felix today. Jim's not about to ruin it.

"And anyway, she made the best baked apples. They're kind of my favorite thing, so. I figured..." Another shrug, and another gulp of wine. "I'd share it with you."